Mindful Moments: Knowing When to Step Back
Hey y'all let's see what's up today! In this section of the blog, I wanted to hopefully share some mental health tips or things that I do to make myself feel better when the world feels like it's falling in. This is going to be kind of like a Chatterbox post but we're going to be doing open discussions about mental health. Please note that I am not a licensed professional, my only experience with mental illness and mental health is.... well living with it. However, I find that sometimes just talking things out and listening to other people that also struggle helps more than sitting in a therapists office for me.
As the title might suggest, today we're going to be talking about knowing when to step back from a situation if you are able. I fully acknowledge that I'm incredibly lucky to have a job that allows me to take mental health breaks and focus on myself when I need to, I know that not every job is that lenient. Because of that I'm not going to be talking about just stepping back completely, I'll also be discussing things that you can do when you acknowledge that you need to step back and you're not really in a position where you can do what you need to do.
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How Do You Know When To Step Back?
Knowing when to take a step back can look different for everybody. We all have different responses to stress, different ways that we cope, and different ways that we choose to self soothe when we're having a hard time. Because of this, it is kind of hard to judge when to step back from a situation based on another person's experience. Personally, my stress tends to make a physical presence and its something that other people tend to notice about me before I completely notice it myself, which may be the case for some of you as well.
Because my stress manifests physically, I'm just going to list a few of the things that I experienced that led me to realizing that it was time to step back from certain situations. If you would like to add to this, please do I would love to hear some other ways that you guys notice your stress manifesting, that way other people who may be experiencing the same issues have some common ground!
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How My Stress Manifests
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How To Step Back
Stress is just a natural part of existing. There are going to be days where you're just stressed out because of everything in life coming at you all at once. While we can't stop everything and hide away until we feel better, you don't always have to just lock in and work through it that can make it worse. But what can we do to step back and take time for ourselves? There's actually quite a bit that we can do:
🌞 Get Up Earlier, and Start the Morning Slowly: One of the biggest things that will stress you out is trying to get the day started in a rush. I've found that waking up a few hours earlier than normal and allowing myself to slowly greet the day helps a lot with that.
🧘 Try Some Yoga or Meditation: Believe it or not, doing a really low effort beginner yoga session, or just a quick 10 minute meditation in the morning can really be beneficial to limiting your stress. I like to do one of the two after breakfast and before I start getting ready for the day that way I'm refreshed and energized.
🥞 Eat A Nice Breakfast: Make yourself some pancakes, oatmeal, or just a nice bagel that you don't have to do a lot of preparation for. I personally like to mix up my own pancake batter, I have the recipe posted under Whiskful Thinking, and that will keep in my fridge for about 4 days to a week, I just take some time to prepare the batter once or twice a week depending on how often I use it.
However, if you're not a morning person, there are some things that can be done at night too
🚿 Do A Longer Shower Routine: Light some candles, break out your favorite skin care, and just treat yourself to a little spa night. You don't have to do a full everything shower to make it relaxing.
🍝 Eat A Good Dinner: Cooking for yourself should be fun and relaxing, so taking the time to make a favorite dish or order your favorite take away from a restaurant is a great way to relax and treat yourself as well. I personally like to eat dinner and watch a movie to unwind, though apparently that's not recommended
💤 Start Getting Ready For Bed Earlier: I've realized that I appreciate a slow night just as much as I appreciate a slow morning. I get home around 6:30, eat at 7, and then just start unwinding for the day so that when I'm ready to sleep I'm able to sleep well.
📚 Read A Book: You don't have to finish it, you don't even have to finish a chapter in one sitting, but reading a book will help you to unwind in an electronic-free way and I find that I really like that considering that I work an office job and stare at screens for most of the day.
By now you're probably thinking "Well we've covered morning and night time but what about the in between hours? I have a stressful job." To that I say, I get you, I also have a very stressful office job. I had the luxury of being able to limit my hours for other reasons outside of just my mental health, but I know not everyone has that luxury, and they may not even have the luxury of an hour lunch. So how can you manage stress?
🪀 Get A Fidget Toy: It sounds a little childish, but sometimes having just something to do with your hands really helps a lot. This could be a stress ball, a pop it or even a fidget cube, just something you can keep on your desk or in your pocket to help you when you're not able to leave work. I personally prefer a Little Ouchies hand grip because I like the texture, and I'll put a link to them here if you want to check them out.
💼 Make Your Desk Space Your Own: You'd be surprised how much a little personalization can make a boring office space feel more comfortable. If you're able to decorate your desk or cubicle it makes you feel a little more secure in your surroundings, and I find that it also takes the drag out of corporate spaces that can be very anxiety inducing
🥘 Enjoy Your Lunches/Breaks: You're at work for most of your day, in the little moments that you have down time, breaks, and lunch make sure to enjoy that time. My old job had the option of sitting outside for breaks, and I found that helped me to recenter myself after a stressful morning. Additionally, packing something good for lunch can help you feel a little more grounded because you're not running off of fast food junk.
🤝 Make Friends With Your Co-Workers: Having coworkers that you know pretty well can make work feel a little less daunting and lower your stress. My coworkers are really cool, and our boss is also really accommodating which I have come to realize is a luxury.
If you try everything that you can, and you're still feel like work is piling up perhaps it would be time to have a chat with your manager, supervisor, or a medical professional to see what can be done to ease your stress and if medications can help. You can also try decreasing your hours though I know that is not an option for everyone.
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What if it's Something Outside of Work?
Sometimes it's not just work that we need to take a step back from, it can be friends, family, and even our partners as well. If you feel like the people in your life are causing you stress and you don't really feel like striking the match to start burning bridges, here are some ways that you can combat that:
🗣 Have An Open Discussion: Honesty is always the best policy, but sometimes being too blunt can cause hurt feelings. Sit them down, explain that you have a lot going on, and you need a bit of time to yourself. It may seem like a harsh boundary, but you can further coordinate plans if you want to from that point forward and see if the person specifically was making you stressed or if it was another factor. It is very important to really step back and take a look at the big picture before you talk to someone about their behavior and limiting your time together. You may find that they weren't even aware they were doing something to cause you stress.
📴 Take Your Time Answering Messages (Within Reason): An immediate answer is not always necessary, you might find it easier to respond to people first thing in the morning before you really get the day started, or after the day's events. While it is okay to take your time responding to messages it is never okay to spontaneously drop off the face of the earth for more than a few days without letting people know that you are stressed and are taking a small break. Give them a rough idea of when you plan to get back in touch, and then if something changes between the present and that provided time frame communicate that to them. It is never acceptable to disappear for such an extended amount of time with no contact that you cause your friends and family to worry that you're no longer with them.
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Closing
The important thing to remember is that we are all human, we all get stressed, and there's never going to be a way to completely avoid stress. However, you can make things easier on yourself by knowing when you need to take time or take a step away from a situation that's giving you a little bit of grief. I would also suggest checking in with a medical professional if you ever get to the point in which you feel like the stress is just consuming your entire life, don't put your mental health on hold for ANYBODY. Stress is my biggest problem area, and I don't handle it well, so this was my first planned post on this section of the blog but if you guys have any topics you'd like me to take a look at and share my thoughts on let me know! I'm always happy to take requests for content. If you want to see more from me feel free to click the link below where you can find my other socials. Y'all take care, and thanks for stopping by!
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